Guest Book

Another Book in the Works

Helen — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 22:56:00 GMT

For the past year, I've been working on writing a memoir with a man who is alive today because of his love for his children, determination to be the man he was meant to be, and an amazing therapist. We're wrapping up all the loose ends and looking for a publisher. Or an agent who will take up our cause.

SYNOPSIS

While blissfully living with his grandparents, a young boy’s existence changes when his parents whisk him away to a life where he is transformed into a sexually depraved monster. For years, he self medicates with drugs, alcohol, and pornography to suppress the lurid childhood memories of the secrets behind closed doors at the rectory. As a grown man with children, he finally realizes that the degrading sexual behaviors embedded in his mind as an impressionable child were the cause of the uncontrollable urges that plagued his life. When he finally encounters a therapist whose patience and understanding enlightens his psyche, the reconstruction of his twisted life begins.

It's an amazing gut-wrenching story, but one that has a thread of hope throughout. He wishes to tell his healing story and help others face their lives no matter how hopeless things seem or regardless how deep the wounds.

The story will help those with addictions of all kinds, not just those abused by religious authority figures. We hope to have our manuscript released as soon as possible to share this amazing story.

Stay tuned one and all.

Helen

If you have any "doubt" - Go See The Movie "Doubt" with Meryl Streep

Helen — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 18:14:00 GMT

We went to the theater Monday night to see the movie, "Doubt" with Meryl Streep, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Amy Adams. There were so many similarities between the movie and our book, Innocence Betrayed. If you've seen it, you probably know what we're talking about.

We encourage people to see the movie. There were many subliminal messages. Even with the clean fingernails. Was he putting himself in the position of being not only physically clean, but also spiritually clean? You'll see many familiar tactics in the movie that are used by predator pastors in real life. We're hearing from more and more people every week.

Predator clergy are very skillful. They are in control of what happens on church property. They are so skillful in their art of deception that they can leave you in doubt of what you know. The morally corrupt administrators and supervisors would rather transfer a predator out instead of being transparent and conducting a thorough investigation. And listen to the priest's sermons and how he used those sermons to protect himself.

We'd love to talk with anyone who has seen this movie.

We were amazed at how well the priest was able to keep his facial expressions intact to never give anything away. He was very well trained to show no guilt. A person with narcistic personality disorder can create havoc in a church environment. They will never take responsibility for what they do. The violent rage and anger that people with this disorder catch many off guard. They will never give any satisfaction to a victim -- never admitting fault to anything. They will always blame it on you. If found in a church setting dealing with a narcissistic pastor, we suggest going to a help group instead of going to the church administrators.

On another topic:

We met face to face with another victim of clergy misconduct yesterday named Suzanne Cyr. She was a former member of the United Church of Christ in Maine. It was an honor to meet a woman with such compassion and strength. She has done extraordinary work teaching children on how to spot a predator. She, too, wants to make legislative changes. She's ready to put the past in the past and turn it into something positive. Her church leaders refused to talk with her face to face. She'd like to see churches' policies available to parishioners when they join the church. If there was a background check conducted on her pastor, she may have been better informed on what she's signing on for when going into a church. She was given a Myers-Briggs test to see if she and the pastor would be a compatible marriage match!

Has anyone else been asked to take a Myers-Briggs Psychological test at their church? The woman in our book was also given the Myers-Briggs test, but in a bible study class. We hear that a test of this nature gives a person such strong insights into the victim's innermost being of their personalities and can be disastrous when given by someone who is not mentally fit to be in the ministry, let alone be in a counseling situation with a parishioner.

Our holiday wish if for everyone involved in clergy misconduct or abuse to step forward and let their voices be heard. All voices matter. And all voices are important. Please use our blog to voice your opinion or tell your story. If there are any husbands and/or dads out there who have gone through anything like the dad in our book, please contact us. We want to hear from you!

Have a happy and safe New Year!

Blessings and Peace to All,

Helen and Curt

Time ranks SBC rejection of sex-offender database as 'under-reported' story

Helen — Sat, 20 Dec 2008 22:57:00 GMT

Time ranks SBC rejection of sex-offender database as 'under-reported' story

By Bob Allen

Wednesday, 17 December 2008

NEW YORK (ABP) -- Time Magazine ranked the Southern Baptist Convention's refusal to establish a database of clergy sex offenders one of the most under-reported news stories in 2008.

A ranking of under-reported stories in Time's "Top 10 Everything of 2008" special feature placed the story at No. 6, behind a mix-up that accidentally sent U.S. nuclear-warhead fuses to Taiwan, the Congolese civil war, violence in Sri Lanka, and new guidelines for insurance coverage for mental health and regulation of food from animals that are genetically altered.

"Facing calls to curb child sex abuse within its churches, in June the Southern Baptist Convention -- the largest U.S. religious body after the Catholic Church -- urged local hiring committees to conduct federal background checks but rejected a proposal to create a central database of staff and clergy who have been either convicted of or indicted on charges of molesting minors," the magazine noted.

"The SBC decided against such a database in part because its principle of local autonomy means it cannot compel individual churches to report any information. And while the headlines regarding churches and pedophilia remain largely focused on Catholic parishes, the lack of hierarchical structure and systematized record-keeping in most Protestant churches makes it harder not only for church leaders to impose standards, but for interested parties to track allegations of abuse."

Christa Brown, Baptist outreach leader for the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, agreed the story was under-reported.

"It's such an extremely important story," she said. "The largest Protestant denomination in the land -- a denomination that claims 16.2 million members -- refused to even attempt to implement the sorts of proactive measures for routing out predators that other major faith groups have."

Brown, a survivor of clergy sex abuse, worked two years to draw attention to the problem of unreported sexual abuse in Southern Baptist churches before seeing denominational leaders recommend against her suggestion of a national database.

Last month Brown and SNAP National Director David Clohessy wrote SBC President Johnny Hunt asking for a meeting about establishing a system to report abusive clergy.

"As president of the Southern Baptist Convention, you now have the opportunity to show genuine leadership on the issue of clergy sex abuse and cover-ups," the letter said. "This may be one of the greatest leadership challenges in the history of Southern Baptists."

The SNAP leaders said Southern Baptists' local-church autonomy makes it all-the-more imperative that congregations have enough information to make responsible decisions about whom they call as ministers.

"The only way people in the pews will find out about clergy child molesters is if victims feel safe in reporting them," they said. "And victims are never going to feel safe if they have to report abuse by going to the church of the accused minister."

"Telling clergy victims to 'go to the church' is like telling them to go to the den of the wolf who savaged them," the letter said. "It is cruel to the victim and unproductive toward the end of protecting others."

-30-

Bob Allen Bob Allen is senior writer for Associated Baptist Press.

Clergy Misconduct and No laws against it - HELP!

Helen — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 17:07:00 GMT

I've heard another anguishing story from a secondary victim of clergy abuse. She's asking for help in getting legislative changes made in her state of Pennsylvania.

It's amazing that clergy abuse/misconduct is not a crime in most states. How can this be? It's truly one of the greatest travesties in our country that predator clergy can hide out in our churches and our states have no laws to prosecute them for the disgusting crime that they commit. If anyone knows what it takes to make legislative changes to make clergy abuse/misconduct a prosecutable crime, please let me know. My list of people who want to help to make this happen is growing!

Read this family's story http://www.nashvillescene.com/2008-04-24/news/the-bad-shepherd/ about what happened to them after their trusted pastor, Rev. Jeremy Benack, "allegedly" groomed their daughter starting at the age of 14 in the Southern Baptist Church in Lansford, Pennsylvania. And then read what I feel is the absolute arrogance of the church's attorney:

“'It is most likely that the plaintiff will voluntarily dismiss her law suit [sic] as to the SBC...,' Guenther writes. 'That is what routinely occurs when the SBC is sued in these kinds of cases. If she does not dismiss her suit, I expect the judge will dismiss the SBC on its motion for summary judgment because the SBC was not involved in this matter in any way.'

"Guenther has every reason to be confident. The SBC has never lost a lawsuit of any kind. In the nearly 50 years he’s represented the denomination, Guenther says the SBC has only been sued in sexual abuse cases five times and settled only one of those—not through an admission of guilt, he adds, but because the denomination’s insurance company chose to pay the plaintiff a 'small nuisance value' rather than the attorney fees to try the case.

"Many SBC higher-ups boast about this record with a sense of bravado. Take this comment from Augie Boto, legal counsel for the SBC executive committee, in an interview with Baptist website SBCOutpost: “Though the SBC is named as a party in legal proceedings about twice per year on average...it has not ever had a judgment rendered against it throughout its entire existence (i.e. since 1845). SBC polity is the major reason for its frequent dismissal out of lawsuits on motions for summary judgment.”

"Riding Out the Storm" by Curt

Helen — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 18:03:00 GMT

It hit me like a lightening bolt the other day the amount of devastation and destruction
that can take place when clergy misconduct takes place in a family unit. The double abuse
hits the family when not one clergy member or church parishioner ever came over to offer our
family support during the height of the storm. In fact, no one ever came to provide aid to my
family to this very day. There was no offer of Christian support and comfort for the family
victims in their time of need, as you hear the churches preach. Unlike the help they give
automatically for example to the hurricane victims. I totally support the approach most
churches take to send help today and ask questions later. Sadly with clergy sexual
abuse/misconduct, the church administrators sometimes drop anchor and send no help at all.
This created a toxic combination being fueled by the super hurricane. It crept into the family
at night, quiet as a mouse.

As the years have come and gone, I've realized the extreme danger and damage that this type of
abuse and misconduct has on secondary family members. It became so bizarre that they all fled,
hoping this was all a bad dream they were hearing about. I can see that family members on both sides
were blinded by the light thinking that certainly a church would never ever leave a family alone and
stranded, while the religious predator moved directly into their family unit. The children's emotions
were exposed daily to the drip drop feeling of this extreme form of religious abuse believing that
surely help was on the way. But it never came.

With that being said, I hope my family's experience will be of help to other families who find
themselves in a religious hurricane with no help in sight. With awareness comes responsibility to
protect the innocent children of God from any harm, by any church, anywhere in the world.

I'm very proud to be called Dad, and I'm very proud to be here today with God's help and support
to hold me when no one could. Thanks to Helen for holding me as only she could, and with her talent
for writing to make sense of it all. I want to thank everyone out there around the world. It
takes a village of people to make a difference, and we all thank you by getting involved and staying
involved. I always ask myself, what would Jesus want me to do at this moment? Then it becomes easy for
me by raising awareness to everyone in helping all of our nation's churches become safer places for all
of God's children. When one must, one can!!

Curt

Curt's Recent Boston Trip and Talking to People about the Book

Helen — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 18:12:00 GMT

    My recent stay in Boston with Helen has been inspirational. She has a shop in a busy tourist area, and we were able to talk with many different types of people about our book, Innocence Betrayed – A Dad’s Story of Clergy Misconduct.

   As we talked, we asked people the question, “What do you think about the title of our book—what visions appear in your head?”

    Some people thought that the story was about physical abuse. But the story is about how misconduct can build up when left unchecked, leading to the physical abuse. The dad in the story was determined to protect his daughters from being exploited by their minister.

    This is a story about the secondary victims of clergy sexual abuse--the ones that watch the actions play out but have no real role in the abuse itself. The victim is unaware of the “grooming process” used on her, as her perpetrator slowly manipulates and brainwashes her into thinking that it was all her idea.

   The story illustrates how the misconduct could have been slowed down. The dad in the story does everything he can to find help. But no one wanted to get involved until he found someone from his past to help him move forward, protect his girls, and find the help groups, AdvocateWeb, SNAP, and The Hope of Survivors.

    So, I just wanted to clarify that about Innocence Betrayed – A Dad’s Story of Clergy Misconduct.

    Churches have set up the perfect cycle for those clergy who have evil in their hearts. The ministers preach that God doesn’t want us to judge others, and parishioners are applauded when they forgive. But the tragedy of that mix is that it can lead to misconduct, which can lead to physical abuse if it’s left unchecked or unmonitored. When there is no accountability for one’s actions, it perpetuates bad behavior. It actually enables the bad behavior to continue.

    By the way, I had fun visiting Helen in Boston.

Curt

Memorial Day 2008 - Curt

Helen — Mon, 26 May 2008 17:10:00 GMT

Memorial Day 2008

Today will always be a special day as we honor those military personal who have defended this great nation in time of need. We also send out our love to all the families that have had, or do have current members that are currently in active duty. May God always be at your side!

My father, a former marine, always taught me that in the military a soldier always follows orders. No questions asked, you just follow orders and perform the ordered command. Pretty serious commands and many soldiers never return home as a result from being a good soldier defending our freedom!

Today we are also praying for our nation's churches. Every one of them, no matter what the nameplate says on the church door. You see, many great church members follow the commands of our church clergy much like a soldier follows a command in the military. Without any questions and absolute trust in what they tell you. They preach things like it's not Christian-like to judge others. In other words do not get involved, and that's toxic thinking when dealing with issues of clergy misconduct, and abuse.

So like good Christians, we do not get involved because we are commanded by God's representative to not judge! Our book shows you why this type of thinking can lead to actions that can almost destroy an innocent American family. But even more importantly gives clues to other family members on how they can help the victims. We ask that all of us as a great nation become aware and get involved to help the many victims and their families that are out there today, lost, innocent without a voice may you be their voice of hope and the love of God!

Curt

Our Thoughts After the Pope's Visit

Helen — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 19:41:00 GMT

Curt and I have voraciously been reading the news reports on the Pope's visit all week. He brought the problem of clergy sexual abuse to the world's attention, but he left without solutions for the victims. He's assuring people that they can come back to church now because they're making things better in the Church. He just didn't say how. No word of the accountability issue.

SNAP (www.survivorsnetwork.org) says, "Strong words must be followed by strong actions that have measurable results." The website is packed with valuable information and lists the five concrete child protection measures that SNAP is asking the Pope to implement over the next six months to a year.

Our book, Innocence Betrayed - A Dad's Story of Clergy Misconduct is the "alarm" and tells what happens when clergy misconduct goes unchecked or flat out ignored. It can lead a victim down the horrible path to clergy sexual abuse. We give information on where a victim can go for help on our website at www.innocencebetrayedbyclergy.com.

The Innocence Betrayed Workbook was written to offer solutions to victims right now. It will aid in recognizing the "grooming process," which is a finely tuned manipulation process that may go on over a long period of time. The Workbook lists prevention tips to help eradicate and one day stomp out clergy sexual abuse. The Pope asked his churches to open their doors to the victims to hear their stories and to aid them in their healing process. He didn't leave parishioners with tips on what to do or say to help victims, but our workbook does offer that type of information.

The problem is not just within the Catholic Church. It happens in all denominations. And the trap is very much the same in each case. The general public needs to know what the pedophiles know about manipulating a victim. Clergy misconduct always leads to abuse. The books explain why the Pope said he was "ashamed." It explains why victims also feel ashamed.

Curt and I feel that change must come from the outside, not inside the church. It's going to have to be a societal change without pressure to meet the statute of limitations, which we feel should be lifted. This could be the critical first step towards change. Clergy should be held to the same standards that we hold our teachers, coaches, and anyone who works with children. All clergy should have their fingerprints on a national database, and we feel it's important for mandatory background checks and regular psychiatric evaluations to take place. This is just a small part of slowing down the predator preachers. After all, a minister plays the intimate duel role of a counselor as well as a spiritual leader and should applaud the implementation of these procedures.

Our clergy members are God's representatives on earth. It's time to seal the cracks that predator clergy crawl through to gain access to our children and vulnerable adults.

We encourage you to respond and let us know what you think.

April Press Release - Cry for Change - Politicians and Family Values

Helen — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 18:29:00 GMT

'Politicians cry out for the need for change and the importance of family values. Our book is about protecting the family, and our hope is to make families safe from predators by crying out for change . . . '

- H.J. Wisocki & C.J. Szajnecki, authors of the newly released book, 'Innocence Betrayed: A Dad's Story of Clergy Misconduct' and new companion Workbook.

CONTACT: Helen Wisocki and Curt Szajnecki, Betrayedbyclergy@comcast.net

MEDIA ADVISORY, April 10,2008 - "We want to shine the light on the issue of misconduct, and our book hopes to protect not only the innocent children, but the entire family unit. Our nation's beloved churches need to see important changes take place," stresses Szajnecki.

"People are aware of professional exploitation that may occur with teachers, coaches, therapists, doctors, etc., but the book educates and illustrates the need for transparency and accountability at the church level," adds Wisocki.

This is a story of a man running against precious time to save his family from an enemy who brilliantly conceals his dark heart while holding a respected position of authority. After his wife is captured, the man worries that his daughters are next into the web of lies, deceit and perversion by their trusted pastor. Time speeds on. The deception unfolds. He frantically searches for help. But he finds more dens of betrayal and trickery, as the church administration minimizes the claims instead of offering help. "The book is the perfect storm on why change in our nation's churches should be a top priority," says Szajnecki.

    "Only through our politicians and the involvement of our nation's citizens will transparency in our churches take place," states Wisocki. "We must all do what we can to slash through the thickets of institutionalized indifference."

The emergency Innocence Betrayed Workbook, for use by individuals or in group settings, aids in teaching how to read the "Signs" of the "Grooming Process" used by a predator authority figure to manipulate and gain access to a victim's inner thoughts and vulnerabilities.

    The website is an awareness center with information on where to go for guidance through the help groups, SNAP, Advocate Web, and The Hope of Survivors. The Innocence Betrayed Workbook will help guide those in trauma or shock towards healing.

For more information about Innocence Betrayed: A Dad’s Story of Clergy Misconduct, visit www.innocencebetrayedbyclergy.com. To book an interview, email your request to betrayedbyclergy@comcast.net

3 insurers shed light on Protestant church sex abuse

Helen — Fri, 28 Mar 2008 16:24:00 GMT

June 14, 2007, The Houston Chronicle
3 insurers shed light on Protestant church sex abuse

By ROSE FRENCH
Associated Press

NASHVILLE, Tenn. — The three companies that insure the majority of Protestant churches in America say they typically receive upward of 260 reports each year of young people under 18 being sexually abused by clergy, church staff, volunteers or congregation members.

The figures released to The Associated Press offer a glimpse into what has long been an extremely difficult phenomenon to pin down — the frequency of sex abuse in Protestant congregations.

Religious groups and victims' supporters have been keenly interested in the figure ever since the Roman Catholic sex abuse crisis hit five years ago. The church has revealed that there have been 13,000 credible accusations against Catholic clerics since 1950.

Protestant numbers have been harder to come by and are sketchier because the denominations are less centralized than the Catholic church; indeed, many congregations are independent, which makes reporting even more difficult.

Some of the only numbers come from three insurance companies — Church Mutual Insurance Co., GuideOne Insurance Co. and Brotherhood Mutual Insurance Co.

Together, they insure 165,495 churches and worship centers for liability against child sex abuse and other sexual misconduct, mostly Protestant congregations but a few other faiths as well. They also insure more than 5,500 religious schools, camps and other organizations.

The companies represent a large chunk of all U.S. Protestant churches. There are about 224,000 in the U.S., according to the Association of Statisticians of American Religious Bodies, although that number excludes most historically black denominations and some other groups, which account for several thousand congregations.

Church Mutual, GuideOne and Brotherhood Mutual each provided statistics on sex abuse claims to The Associated Press, although they did not produce supporting documentation or a way to determine whether the reports were credible.

The largest company, Church Mutual, reported an average of about 100 sex abuse cases a year involving minors over the past decade. GuideOne, which has about half the clients of Church Mutual, said it has received an average of 160 reports of sex abuse against minors every year for the past two decades.

Brotherhood Mutual said it has received an average of 73 reports of child sex abuse and other sexual misconduct every year for the past 15 years. However, Brotherhood does not specify which victims are younger than 18 so it is impossible to accurately add that to the total cases.

Abuse reports don't always mean the accused was guilty, and they don't necessarily result in financial awards or settlements, the companies said. The reports include accusations against clergy, church staff and volunteers.

Even with hundreds of cases a year "that's a very small number. That probably doesn't even constitute half," said Gary Schoener, director of the Walk-In Counseling Center in Minneapolis, a consultant on hundreds of Protestant and Catholic clergy misconduct cases. "Sex abuse in any domain, including the church, is reported seldom. We know a small amount actually come forward."

Tom Farr, general counsel and senior vice president of claims for GuideOne, based in West Des Moines, Iowa, said most abuse cases are resolved privately in court-ordered mediation. Awards can range from millions of dollars down to paying for counseling for victims, he said.

One of the largest settlements to date in Protestant churches involved the case of former Lutheran minister Gerald Patrick Thomas Jr. in Texas, where a jury several years ago awarded the minister's victims nearly $37 million. Separate earlier settlements involving Thomas cost an additional $32 million.

When insurance companies first started getting reports of abuse from churches nearly two decades ago, the cases usually involved abuse that happened many years earlier. But over the past several years, the alleged abuse is more recent — which could reflect a greater awareness about reporting abuse, insurance companies said.

Insurance officials said the number of sex abuse cases has remained steady over the past two decades, but they also said churches are working harder to prevent child sex abuse by conducting background checks, installing windows in nurseries and play areas and requiring at least two adults in a room with a child.

Patrick Moreland, vice president of marketing for Church Mutual, said churches are particularly susceptible to abusers.

"By their nature, congregations are the most trusting of organizations, so that makes them attractive targets for predators," he said. "If you're a predator, where do you go? You go to a congregation that will welcome you."

A victims' advocacy group has said the Southern Baptists, the nation's largest Protestant denomination, could do more to prevent abuse by creating a list of accused clergy the public and churches could access.

"I think they should have a list of credibly reported clergy child abuse," said Christa Brown, a member of the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, a group initially created to hold the Catholic church accountable for sex abuse by its clergy.

"These are things people are entitled to know," said Brown, who says she was sexually abused as a child by a Southern Baptist minister. "The only way to prevent this crime is to break the code of silence and to have absolute transparency when allegations are raised."

At the Southern Baptist Convention's annual meeting in San Antonio this week, the Rev. Wade Burleson of Enid, Okla., proposed a feasibility study into developing a national database of Southern Baptist ministers who have been "credibly accused of, personally confessed to, or legally been convicted of sexual harassment or abuse."

A convention committee referred Burleson's motion to the SBC executive committee, which will report back with findings and a recommendation at next year's meeting in Indianapolis.

Southern Baptist President Frank Page said leaders are considering several options to help churches protect children against abuse.

"We believe that the Scripture teaches that the church should be an autonomous, independent organization," Page said. "We encourage churches to hold accountable at the local level those who may have misused the trust of precious children and youth."

Several years ago, the Baptist General Convention of Texas, which represents moderates who have increasingly distanced themselves from the conservative-led Southern Baptists, started a list of accused clergy for churches, but not the public. Under pressure from victim advocates, the Texas group just released the names of some convicted sex offenders who may have been ministers in local congregations.

Joe Trull, editor of Christian Ethics Today and retired ethics professor at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary, helped the Texas convention create its registry and says there are now about 11 cases involving clergy abuse with minors.

But he believes these are just the "tip of the iceberg" because churches don't have to report abuse cases to the registry and aren't likely to.

"The problem we're having is that churches just weren't sending the names," Trull said. "In the normal scenario, they just try to keep it secret. We're going to have to be more proactive and let them know if they don't come forward, they're helping to perpetuate this problem."

http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/headline/nation/4890603.html

StopBaptistPredators.org

"My people are destroyed for their lack of knowledge . . ." Hosea 4:6

Helen — Sat, 15 Mar 2008 16:21:00 GMT

Friend and fellow author, Linda Hiles has taken a quote from Ephesians and posted it not only in her book, "Arise, O Sleeper," but on her book site at www.lindahiles.com.

We relate to these powerful words below in our battle to spread the word of the deception of church leaders. Since publishing our book, many people have contacted us, and we've spoken to many unsuspecting future victims of clergy misconduct. Our book shows the pathway of how a pastor can turn his direction from one with Christ to a ministry of seduction, using the grooming process to do so.

Most people don't seem to fully understand how wrong it is for a pastor to even give a woman parishioner a wink, let alone talk to her using sexually suggestive language. Clergy members are supposed to be representatives of God--not trolling for a future mate or going after another man's mate or child while at church. People seem to be blinded by these false prophets who are truly not God's representatives and only out for their own gain--sexually and financially.

We ask others how they feel about these words as they relate to clergy sexual misconduct and abuse?

"Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of praying for all the saints."

(Ephesians 6:10-18)

Helen and Curt

SNAP - Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests

Helen — Wed, 12 Mar 2008 16:26:00 GMT

We have so much for which to thank Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests (SNAP). They are the nation's oldest and largest help group for those who have suffered from misconduct and/or abuse by either priests, ministers, or clergy in general.

They were there when I needed them the most many years ago when looking for someone to listen and not turn a deaf ear on my cries. Although I though they were only involved with abuse by Catholic clergy, I found them to be open to getting involved with the Protestant side of clergy misconduct. And now they even have a branch led by Christa Brown for the Baptist problems of clergy abuse.

SNAP has been very kind to have our book listed on their website. Please visit their web site at www.snapnetwork.org and scroll down to the section that reads "Books We Recommend" and click on that icon. Our book is the first book listed on that page. The website has valuable information throughout.

Again our many thanks to SNAP for making it possible for us and others to help raise awareness of the problem and to try and stomp out all forms of clergy abuse and misconduct!

Blessings,

Curt

Should Clergy Members be Fingerprinted like Teachers Are?

Helen — Wed, 27 Feb 2008 21:23:00 GMT

   Should there be mandatory fingerprinting and background checks for clergy before they're allowed to become a minister and counsel church members? Would they be less likely to put their hands where they don't belong if they were fingerprinted? Or at least slow them down.

   Teachers must go through background checks and fingerprinting. Teachers spend many hours with children. Catholic priests work closely with altar boys. Protestant Pastors take children on church retreats, have access to children through bible study classes, choir practices, as well as many other activities in and away from church. There are many opportunities for them to be alone with children and adults.

   There's no doubt that churches are a perfect hideout for predators and pedophiles. No background checks many times and no fingerprinting.

   The country's leaders are calling for change--we think that changes must be made in our churches.

Interesting Article from the Chicago Sun Times

Helen — Sat, 26 Jan 2008 00:20:00 GMT

The following is a letter from Barbara Dorris of SNAP. Please visit the link for some very interesting comments--especially the one from Pope Benedict XVI th on January 25 and the comment from Anne from Texas two posts below the Pontiff's post

Dear Friends,

This is an article from the Chicago Sun Times describing how those involved in the Father Daniel McCormack case, a priest convicted of child sexual abuse and currently serving time in prison, have been promoted rather than disciplined for the part they played in both allowing McCormack to continue to function as a priest even after they had knowledge of his abusive behavior and in the resulting cover-up.

Please add a comment on the blog and/or write a letter to the editor. The archdiocese's behavior in this case is particularly egregious and the archdiocese needs to be held accountable.

This is a good chance to express your feelings on this reckless behavior and educate people that this is not an isolated incident.

http://blogs.suntimes.com/religion/2008/01/the_cardinal_his_men_and_the_m.html#more

My answer to the blog is below:

When will we see change? When will all this stop? The Catholic Church continues to move their pedophile priests to other unsuspecting parishes, and the innocent children are abused, their lives forever changed reliving their nightmare of clergy abuse.

    My co-author, Curt Szajnecki and I have written a book about the same thing happening in a Methodist church. We've put together a workbook to help sound the alarm that this is happening in all denominations and must stop. The innocents are suffering every day and the churches seem to only look at their own bottom line. Where are the caring and compassionate clergy we've been taught to trust and respect?

    We all need to shout out that we're not going to take this any more and call for legislative changes where the churches have to be held responsible for their destructive decisions. There is no accountability, and the churches that hide the predators and move them to continue their heinous crimes should have their tax-exempt status revoked. Why not fingerprint all clergy, as they do with teachers? Without background checks on clergy and fingerprinting, pedophiles are allowed to infiltrate the churches. Then the cover-up begins.

    We join the help groups that aid those abused by clergy, SNAP (Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests), Advocate Web, and The Hope of Survivors to call for changes in our churches to hold clergy responsible for their actions and make our churches the safe havens they should be.

Helen Wisocki

Ringing the Alarm for Liberty and Justice for all - Happy New Year in 2008

Helen — Tue, 01 Jan 2008 02:44:00 GMT

We're coming off a strong finish ending the year 2007, meeting so many wonderful people who are there to aid others in distress, especially Janet Patterson and David Clohessy from SNAP, Cindy Bolling from Advocate Web, and Samantha and Steve Nelson from The Hope of Survivors. You've played an important role in supporting and helping us sound the alarm on how to read the signs of clergy misconduct so that we will make people aware of what's happening in our churches today. We want to wish these groups continued success in 2008 as they reach out to help the victims of clergy misconduct/abuse. Wouldn't it be grand if this was the year that we stamp out all forms of clergy misconduct and abuse.

Thanks to Peggy Warren for inviting us to speak about our book and giving us the opportunity to announce our just-finished workbook. Peggy's website is www.educatingtoendabuse.com giving victims a voice to be heard. As a victim of clergy sexual abuse, Peggy's website is worth the look, as it is very informative and enlightening.

We've truly been blessed this year with the publishing of our book and now with our workbook complete and ready to go as an aid for current and former church members or anyone who finds themselves in the presence of clergy. It may be used as an aid to families of the affected victims of clergy misconduct. It will also help chairpersons and other members of church committees be aware of how multiple episodes of clergy misconduct may affect a family and extended family of a victim and encourage them to take action when clergy misconduct is suspected or brought to their attention.

The workbook is a tool to aid in reading and processing our book. They are designed to work together as a systematic problem-solving resource guide. It can be ordered from the home page of our website.

We're wishing everyone a happy, healthy New Year. May we put on the armor of the Lord and do what Jesus would do--spread the word of awareness to people that you love and care for.

Peace,

Helen and Curt

Merry Christmas

Helen — Wed, 26 Dec 2007 04:30:00 GMT

We hope that everyone enjoyed the celebration of the birth of Jesus. As Christmas unfolded this year, it struck me that much of what we have to offer in the book is like giving our gifts to others on Christmas. We feel that our book is an honor to our Lord.

As we gift to others at Christmas, we hope that our book will reach out and protect the innocent from all forms of clergy misconduct. The gift we offer is to raise awareness not only at Christmas time but each and every day of the year. This is our prayer on the day our Christ child was born. Happy Holidays to all. May peace be with you.

Cheers,

Curt Szajnecki

Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!

Helen — Thu, 22 Nov 2007 16:26:00 GMT

    A wonderful Thanksgiving to everyone that have supported our efforts to make all churches a safer place to worship. As I bow my head today, I will give thanks to our Lord above for His will to be done, as we work to spread the word of awareness to others. This will be the first Thanksgiving in a long time that we are no longer alone in this world. We have all the wonderful people that have helped us along the way.

   Thank you all for your prayers and messages that you have left, and the many others that have spread the words of awareness that they have come in contact with.

   Special thanks to the national and international support groups that have guided us along the way.
And lastly thanks to the Lord above for sending my co-author Helen my way, or I would still be alone in the dark.

   Happy Thanksgiving to all, and may you rest in His loving arms with your loved ones today!!

Blessings,

Curt Szajnecki

Moving Forward

Helen — Mon, 05 Nov 2007 00:39:00 GMT

   We're continuing to move forward and are putting together a "workbook," sharing our thoughts on watching for the "signs" of clergy misconduct and suggestions of where to go for help. What happened in our story can happen to anyone. We hope to make others aware of the possibility to help other families before it occurs.

   We all need to be the protectors of our children's innocence. We need to look after vulnerable adults, too. Everyone needs to speak out!!

   We're loving all the positive emails we're receiving. Keep them coming!

Blessings to Everyone,

Helen

We Know You're Reading the Book--Let Us Know What You Think!

Helen — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 15:52:00 GMT

To all of you who have received the book,

   We're anxious to know what you think. Even if you've only read the first chapter. Please give us some feedback!

   My first book signing is coming up next Thursday, October 25. I'll have to do it solo, as Curt's still in Michigan. But we plan on more signings in both Massachusetts and Michigan as soon as we possibly can.

   Thanks to all the positive encouragement to our email account so far! We love to hear from you.

   Please everyone, spread the word. We want to shine a light on what takes place in the dark corners of many churches. Those dark steeples on our book cover represent the church's non-action by the parishioners themselves. There was no response to the family's pleas for help. When you leave things up to the church administrators to take care of a family in need, this is a story of what can happen.

   Since the book is fictional, no one needs to take it personally, but we encourage all to read the book, especially the church goers. It could possibly change your life.

   The steeples need to be lit up and people need to be informed. And we all need to be protectors of our children's innocence. Do you agree?

Helen

Tell Us What You Think!

Helen — Thu, 11 Oct 2007 12:43:00 GMT

     Book orders are being filled, and we're anxious to know what you think!

     Curt finally got his copies, and his mom told me yesterday that the cover alone will grab the reader's attention. She's having a little trouble with her eyesight, so she's asking Curt to read a little bit of the book to her every day. So far, she likes it! She told me how proud she was of us for finally getting our project out there for all to read.

     It's been a very long journey, but so well worth it when we hold our masterpiece in our hands. We've truly been blessed. Curt keeps saying that God is guiding us. I think he knows what he's talking about!

Helen