Curt's Recent Boston Trip and Talking to People about the Book
Posted by Helen at 7/22/2008 2:12 PM and is filed under uncategorized 
My recent stay in Boston with Helen has been inspirational. She has a shop in a busy tourist area, and we were able to talk with many different types of people about our book, Innocence Betrayed – A Dad’s Story of Clergy Misconduct.
As we talked, we asked people the question, “What do you think about the title of our book—what visions appear in your head?”
Some people thought that the story was about physical abuse. But the story is about how misconduct can build up when left unchecked, leading to the physical abuse. The dad in the story was determined to protect his daughters from being exploited by their minister.
This is a story about the secondary victims of clergy sexual abuse--the ones that watch the actions play out but have no real role in the abuse itself. The victim is unaware of the “grooming process” used on her, as her perpetrator slowly manipulates and brainwashes her into thinking that it was all her idea.
The story illustrates how the misconduct could have been slowed down. The dad in the story does everything he can to find help. But no one wanted to get involved until he found someone from his past to help him move forward, protect his girls, and find the help groups, AdvocateWeb, SNAP, and The Hope of Survivors.
So, I just wanted to clarify that about Innocence Betrayed – A Dad’s Story of Clergy Misconduct.
Churches have set up the perfect cycle for those clergy who have evil in their hearts. The ministers preach that God doesn’t want us to judge others, and parishioners are applauded when they forgive. But the tragedy of that mix is that it can lead to misconduct, which can lead to physical abuse if it’s left unchecked or unmonitored. When there is no accountability for one’s actions, it perpetuates bad behavior. It actually enables the bad behavior to continue.
By the way, I had fun visiting Helen in Boston.
Curt
As we talked, we asked people the question, “What do you think about the title of our book—what visions appear in your head?”
Some people thought that the story was about physical abuse. But the story is about how misconduct can build up when left unchecked, leading to the physical abuse. The dad in the story was determined to protect his daughters from being exploited by their minister.
This is a story about the secondary victims of clergy sexual abuse--the ones that watch the actions play out but have no real role in the abuse itself. The victim is unaware of the “grooming process” used on her, as her perpetrator slowly manipulates and brainwashes her into thinking that it was all her idea.
The story illustrates how the misconduct could have been slowed down. The dad in the story does everything he can to find help. But no one wanted to get involved until he found someone from his past to help him move forward, protect his girls, and find the help groups, AdvocateWeb, SNAP, and The Hope of Survivors.
So, I just wanted to clarify that about Innocence Betrayed – A Dad’s Story of Clergy Misconduct.
Churches have set up the perfect cycle for those clergy who have evil in their hearts. The ministers preach that God doesn’t want us to judge others, and parishioners are applauded when they forgive. But the tragedy of that mix is that it can lead to misconduct, which can lead to physical abuse if it’s left unchecked or unmonitored. When there is no accountability for one’s actions, it perpetuates bad behavior. It actually enables the bad behavior to continue.
By the way, I had fun visiting Helen in Boston.
Curt
Bravo to you my faithful servant, continued success!!
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Awareness and education are key elements in stopping the flagrant abuse of power by those we should be able to trust. This is true of ANY authority figure. But most of all, clergy, as we are taught that they can be trusted with our innermost being.
Unfortunately there are many who are unaware, or who are either blinded by their faith, or by refusing to believe what they see. When little children are involved, those entrusted with their care often think they are making it up. It always should be followed up and the actions of the abuser observed and stopped. In the case presented in your book, 'following up' was met with blindness and cover up on the part of those higher up in the church. Truly a travesty on the part of the church.
The father in the book was met with cover up after cover up. This is all too common and shameful on the part of those in charge of the church.
Keep up the hard work, and don't forget to have some fun for yourselves. You deserve it!!
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It appears to us that your message of awareness and education are hitting right on target! Some of us are trapped in a system where the truth is not allowed, but punished. We will pray that your mission will one day prove that your good works are worth all the time and effort you have put into it. Many of us on the inside also hope and pray that help will one day come our way, and remove the bad apples from our ranks. It disturbs us all very, very, much to say the least.
Always remember that God is watching down on you from above, and he is cheering you on to victory to stop once and for all forms of clergy abuse and misconduct against innocent victims. Blessings from above!
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